outstation

my frist time of outstation
JOHOR
went yesterday and back by today

i really refuse to go
1) far destination-4 hours
2) unfamiliar place-never been before seens i primary
3) awkward
4) of cause need to social

even now i also refuse
but is quite easy task
u just have to be there to work for 3 HOURS
yup that's today morning 8.30am to 12.00pm
that's all
just take it as an experience

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next topic

i'm still in the NEGATIVE MOOD
and still thinking what's wrong with me and what am i doing
am i doing it right or wrong?
i keep telling people that
not everything can be judge for right or wrong
but till myself, i'm stuck here

and my feeling are so kelam kabut this few days
cant control my mind and my heart
again, i'm i right or wrong

what la!
i just confusing myself

i really have to cheer up myself

andi think that's 1 more person confusing me and frastrating me......
but i dono just i ask
or how should i deal with

me ain't me

why the eldest 1 always have to let younger first
why wrong always go to eldest first

sometimes i really think why have to be me - the eldest
most of the time i'm happy with it, but not this moment
i'm the eldest daughter but i ain't like

ya i'm naive, childish, not 24 years old acting, immatured.....
why i have to be act matured!
why i have to stand for so many thing
why i have so many things to think

i hate to think
i use to forget
i already not using my 'forgetful' for so long

i use to be POSITIVE girl
but now why i become negative girl
i loss

same thing happened again, i always and again keep quiet, no argue no quarel
but when/if the same thing happened on my sis there, i'll get scold again
why i just don go argue with her right now~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why i just telling and yelling at here~!!!!!!!!
i know if i go i'll be the trouble maker again.....
both will be black face, my dad will just ask me let the sis
what am i?!
why always this kind of thing happened i am the 1 who say sorry first!
why i have to talk to her first!
eventhough till now i no regret before!
cause i knew that if i'm not doing this both of us will just keep no talking
and i also knew that my sis will not talk with me 1st!!!!
undestand ah?!
i no wrong but why make me feel i'm wrong!
just because i'm the only sis and the eldest?

i really dono how....
i really tired with all this
i think i am the problem
i have no more idea what can i do

how to become back the
real positive me
ain't pretend positive me

electronic

i think i'm not good relation with electronics

those electronics goods with me will have no long life and will spoiled without knowing

dvd player wont stay long
car cd player ate 1 of my disc for almost 2 years
my sim card also sot sot dei
laptop old and slow than turtle

i think my phone also soon...

feel kesian for my phone.. TT.TT

슬퍼죠

난다른 사람한데 뭔대?

사실은

난 아무 것 도 아니..........

좀 슬퍼......

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why suddenly so many people know korean!!!!
i no more feel is save ah~!!!!

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난 친구 한데 ...... 있어?

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i just don know what is my filling now
i just can say i don want care anything anymore
i trying not to care.....

i have to let go many thing
if i still holing it i'll get more suffer.......
just let go ba

this few days i keep on thinking to go another place to go my new life
i really wanted to do that
just timing and money

ya ...i'm running away...........

i want to runaway.....

random blog

just for the sick of writing something
everytime also like that
got lots of idea what i should write
but when the time i sitting in front of computer then my brain go blank
shit

> saw my fren facebook, i want to go KOREA
> i want buy LAPTOP
> i want buy DXL

looking on online booking now-AIR ASIA
buying ticket!
to.........KUCHING~!

but~~~~~
i cant PAY
i don knot why....
so sien~~~~
want pay also cant......